Growing up in Louisa – Kay Varney Maynard
Weekly feature . . . by Mike Coburn
It think it is good that a few of us have the predisposition to live life joyfully even if we embarrass ourselves a little in front of others. I’m not talking about the faux pas everyone commits now and again. My focus today is on one person that belongs to an eminent collection of people that can be depended upon to entertain us all with pranks and performances. Not just April Fool’s Day jokes, but every day, riots of fun. They are the kind of folks that are not satisfied with being passengers, but choose instead to be life’s hood ornament. They are altogether wonderful as they camouflage the dark places and distract us from our troubles. They help make life worthwhile. These thespians are the crème that rises above the crowd with slapstick to break up our monotony, or despair. That is appreciated. One example of this kind of behavior is seen in the introduction of the old Dick Van Dyke Show on 60’s TV. You will recall that the star, Rob Petrie, played by the well-known and beloved actor, would enter his home and trip over an ottoman. In later seasons he would instead catch himself and not take the expected fall.
Years ago, back in the age when the old normal college building still stood, this person of comic aptitude roamed the halls of our high school. Behind her she left echoes of merriment caused merely by her passing by. She was not one of those teens who in their insecurities fought to become like all the others. No, she didn’t cower from being her own special person. Her peers were her audience; the laughter her reward. She loved her classmates dearly, but reasoned that were clearly happier when they were laughing. She took on the commission and worn her mantle well.
She was a master of clowning at LHS. I’m told that every class has at least one such person, but to me this lady of jest stood out in the realms of hilarity. Jerry Lewis or Lucile Ball had nothing on her. I fully understood her playfulness because we were kindred spirits, performing in fun-loving ways. If kids were to ‘have fun,’ that is, ‘good old plain clean, fun,’ then she was the answer. It was common to hear screams of delight and uncontrollable laughter when this ‘Queen of Myrth’ was in the region. Others from the day will know her and remember the girl covered in shaving cream and howling at the fun. Even teachers stood amazed at her antics. Some would scatter at the threat of being involved in the melee.
It’s been several years now since I first told the story of this Head Cheerleader. It is worth the telling again methinks. Kay found herself late again to my aunt’s math class. As might be expected of her she made her grand entrance, which I assume was intended to distract attention from her being tardy. It worked. Moments later no one would notice the clock, but rather the result of her actions. When hustling into the room with her accustomed fanfare she did not take into account that the floors were recently oiled, as was the habit of janitors in those days. Both of her feet went skyward and her whole body slammed profoundly to the floor. Everyone in class was delighted and on their feet, shouting and pointing. Even the teacher was in hysterics. The noise was as if the Bulldogs had scored again.
As it happened, I was also late and only just behind her. I benefitted from her distraction, too. It crossed my mind to prove that chivalry was not dead. I rushed over to help to her feet, but suddenly, I, too, was airborne. The score was ‘janitors’ two, ‘clowns’ zero! The resulting thud shook the building and more screams rose from the classroom. By luck I had just missed landing on her, but it was close enough to be scary. We sat up, pointed at each other and laughed with tears flowing down our cheeks. Speaking of cheeks, it was then that the two of us saw the classroom door open behind us. There stood our Principal, Mr. Jim Cheek, whose office was adjacent to our classroom. Having seen the source of the commotion, his investigation was complete. He just shook his head, backed out of the room, and closed the door behind him. Whew! My poor, sore ‘cheeks’ wouldn’t have been able to withstand the paddle.
While none of this was staged or planned, it does point out how wonderful it is to have one or two clowns floating atop of the milkshake of life. Else, where could you add the cherry? Other such events with her were countless, whether it was on a school trip, at band camp, or during a pep rally assembly. She was there bringing delight to everyone. When I saw her at a reunion a couple of years ago she hadn’t changed in this respect. I was so glad. To laugh is to live. Yes, we’ll all have tears from time to time in our lives, but like our wonderful, joyful, Kay, let us focus instead on bringing others those windows of happiness with roars of laughter. Those are the good times that we want to remember. Thanks for the joy, and for being you, Kay. mcoburncppo@aol.com